Frustrated
I'm fed up. Just fucking pissed off. And I guess it's understandable, given the circumstances and what I've been through with guys. If I was as cynical as I sometimes seem to be I'd denounce the entire gender and turn lesbian, but I guess there's hope for me yet.
Nothing happened to set me off - I guess it's the fact that nothing ever happens that's getting to me. I'm sick of stagnating, frustrated by the lack of progress in my life. In any sphere of it.
My brother's out on bail, having been charged with attempted murder for a self-defense shooting. The shot guy has ten witnesses saying my brother attacked him without provocation. My brother has nobody to support his claim - which I believe - that he was hit over the head with a beer bottle prior to his shooting of the man. Attempted murder carries a life sentence. My brother is a white guy in a black country. Enough said.
I'm becoming increasingly schizophrenic. I might be able to function normally in society if I didn't have the stresses of upcoming Cambridge and my brother's trial to deal with in addition to all the drama that comes with being me.
No time to type. Sigh. I'm outta here.
Nothing happened to set me off - I guess it's the fact that nothing ever happens that's getting to me. I'm sick of stagnating, frustrated by the lack of progress in my life. In any sphere of it.
My brother's out on bail, having been charged with attempted murder for a self-defense shooting. The shot guy has ten witnesses saying my brother attacked him without provocation. My brother has nobody to support his claim - which I believe - that he was hit over the head with a beer bottle prior to his shooting of the man. Attempted murder carries a life sentence. My brother is a white guy in a black country. Enough said.
I'm becoming increasingly schizophrenic. I might be able to function normally in society if I didn't have the stresses of upcoming Cambridge and my brother's trial to deal with in addition to all the drama that comes with being me.
No time to type. Sigh. I'm outta here.
posted by Ariana at 11:31 PM
4 Comments:
You're moving to the UK?
For college??
Man.
Nooooo. Lol. Down here we use the British system of education, so high school is forms 1 to 5 and then you write what we call CXC - it's a Caribbean examination, replacing O-levels - and then there's form lower 6 and upper 6, and then you write Cambridge, which is A-levels. It's all a great pain in the ass.
oh... hmmm.
Confusing.
So that means next year is your last?
/s/ Andrew
ps: whats the deal with the story. And how is HE doing?? Any more problems?
It means that I'll be out of high school by next year June. I'll have officially "graduated" by early July, and then I have a year with which to do as I wish before deciding whether or not to go to university.
The story...it's coming. Slowly. My brain is fleshing out the characters, giving them pasts and voices and phobias like regular people. Of course, HE is the furthest thing from a regular person. Sigh.
I don't know that he's been giving me problems, exactly. We're clashing on his future...we've come to a wary sort of compromise - I can let Ashley (his wife, and she's half his age, mind you) succumb to the schizophrenia she's already genetically predisposed to as long as I keep their son unharmed. Which I've agreed to.
Speaking of, how's Luna? Try to get some more of what's in your head down. It looks pretty damned good on "paper".
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